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He was always aware that he was, in some way, an intruder, a person who had been allowed into a room where he didn't belong, and who was always waiting to be asked to leave. And yet he also knew that he was loved, and that he was lucky, and that he was cared for. He just didn't know how to reconcile these two things: the fact of his own worthlessness and the fact of his friends' devotion. He had spent his life trying to bridge the gap between the person he was and the person he wanted to be, but the gap was too wide, and he was too tired, and the bridge was always breaking.
Hanya Yanagihara’s A Little Life is renowned for its intense emotional depth and its exploration of the limits of human endurance and friendship.